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Friday, March 11, 2011

#79 "Anti-Bullying Perspective" An Essay By Susan Pearl

Many years ago an afternoon "talk show" had a special guest for the show.  She was a young successful model who had now reached movie star stature.  The host of the "talk show" seemed apologetic as he posed the first question to ask her.

The host started the question by stating that he thought he already knew the answer to his question since the guest was only 22 years old but he was going to ask it anyway--so the host then asked, "If you had your life to live over is there anything you would do different?"  The host and the audience were absolutely stunned when the guest answered the question by saying, "Yes, there is something I would do different."

The host, in dismay, said he was surprised at her answer because she was so successful at such a very young age what could it possibly be that she would have done differently. 

The guest composed herself and then explained that when she was in high school there was a very small boy in her class.  She said he was constantly teased and bullyed for being small. She swallowed hard as she went on to tell that in band class the teacher had been called away and the students were suppose to go ahead and practice.  Several class bullies took the small classmate and locked him in a base guitar case.  He stayed in the base guitar case throughout the entire class period.  The bullies let him out at the end of the class.  She then went on to tell that the experence was so humiliating for the small boy that he committed suicide that same evening.  The guest then began to cry.

The host of the "talk show" was caught off guard by the guest sobbing and her sadness.  The host leaned forward and asked, "So what would you have done different?"

The beautiful young actress wiped her eyes and answered in an emotionally trembling voice, "I would have let him out.  If I had my life to live over I would have let him out."

Her grief and regret were real and to this day I remember how moved I felt by her sincere sorrow.

To bully and humiliate another caryy far outreaching consequences for these disrespectful actions. It not only effects the peace of mind of the victim being bullied but also it can take away the peace of mind of those witnessing the bullying.  Sometimes this loss of peace of mind can last an entire lifetime and become harder to bear as time passes. Because with time there comes a true realization of how precious life and how very meaningful actions for the good for all can be. Bullying comes with a very high price of regret that is often paid for day after day with emotional currency.

It is best to stop bullying by not having it be accepted.  A change in people's hearts needs to take place and it can with time and an anti-bullying grace of perception.  Such a perception would reveal that "all" of the students of that band class were locked in a "case of fear" that day.  Then later they would be locked into a "case of regret".  The students who witnessed the terrible humiliation of a classmate that day will forever regret not coming to his aid.  Bullying causes so much emotional distress, pain, so much loss for so many for so long.  An anti-bullying grace would change the perspective that any type of bullying is not an acceptable behavior because such actions have terrible consequences.  Inflicting pain upon another should never be considered fun for anyone.

This "talk show" I viewed was on television probably fifty years ago.  When I see the reports and interviews on televion today about bullying I see that same pain, hurt and regret.  Bullying is still locking people into "cases".  I remember her words that day, "I would have let him out."

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