#114 "The Calming Comment" By Susan Pearl

The plans for the wedding had been worked on for nearly a year.
Every possible senario had been thought of that could go wrong and corrective actions had been taken to counteract any possible problems.
The big day arrived and there stood before them a problem and it was something that had not been anticipated-----a hungover grooms man.
The focus shifted from the bride to thoughts of can the grooms man make it through the cermony without passing out.
He looked very hungover and he seemed unaware of how bad he looked in appearance and in seeming totally aware of the importance of the occasion.
The mother of the bride was horrified to say the least.
Several weeks later the bride and groom and their parents met to spend a day together and look at the photos of the wedding.
The grooms man condition showed up in the pictures of the wedding and even in the professional photos of the wedding.
That was enough for the gathering to express their anger of how irresponsible the grooms man had been.
One by one they expressed their total disappointment and disgust of him for doing that to their special day.
The father of the groom didn't say anything for quite awhile but when the remarks about the grooms man were going at full steam the groom's father spoke up and said,  "I just don't think he has been the same since he lost his dad."
The mother of the bride had grown up without her dad and she immediately understood what the grooms man was going through.
No one said another angry word about the grooms man.
The groom's father had brought an understanding into the situation.
His words had brought a calming effect into the setting and the day continued being calmer and became a time of peace even when seeing pictures of the grooms man. 
No one felt angry anymore.
I think we need more "calming comments" in discussions where people are upset about an event.
Maybe being unaware of the full picture even while looking at the pictures of the event a "calming comment" can bring about a new way of looking at the pictures and seeing the pictures with understanding.